Herpes is a widespread sexually transmitted disease (STD) — around 12% of people aged 14-49 in the U.S. are infected with HSV-2, the virus that commonly causes genital herpes.1 Despite how common it is, having herpes carries a stigma because of people’s stereotypes about the infection and miseducation about STDs in general.2
This can make dating with herpes difficult, which is why herpes dating sites have grown in popularity. These sites help people living with herpes or other STDs find potential mates who aren’t weighed down by hesitancy, fears, or misapprehensions because they have an infection, too. This eliminates some of the strain the diagnosis can have on budding relationships.
Could a dating site exclusively for people living with herpes work well for you? Using our guide, you’ll better understand how herpes dating sites function, what these sites offer daters, and which site will most help your love life. For those in a hurry, here’s a quick look at our findings.
Positive Singles is our overall top choice for herpes dating sites. The large member population and community resources set it apart from the rest.
Positive Singles has generated over 60,000 member-written success stories and millions of member conversations. Odds are in your favor here if you’re looking for love within the positive community.
In order to evaluate the herpes dating sites in our guide, we focused on five criteria we feel would be most important to potential users. These include privacy, cost, dating pool, available free features, and herpes resources.
Winner: Positive Singles
Your privacy is critical when it comes to dating with herpes. These sites know that your diagnosis is private and something you alone should choose to disclose. Because of this, they take many steps to protect your personal information, payment, and profile. Every site offers its own variation of privacy settings so you can take control.
Our winner for privacy is Positive Singles because of the number of privacy features the site offers. Users can report profiles that violate community terms of use and take steps to verify their own profiles by submitting a government-issued photo ID. Positive Singles also protects your information from third parties by keeping it private — it explicitly states that it won’t rent or sell your details. The company also keeps purchases discreet by appearing as SuccessfulMatch on your bank statement. And if you delete your profile, your data will likely be gone from the company’s systems within six months.
One minor knock on Positive Singles is that its photo and profile visibility controls are only available to paying members, whereas sites like Meet Positives allow you to control who sees your profile and images for free.
Winner: Positive Singles
Online dating can be all about odds; the more potential matches, the better your chances. We chose sites with large or selective and exclusive dating pools in this guide. For example, some sites boast large numbers, but many of those profiles may be inactive. Some sites take measures to ensure their members are invested in the process. We took both situations into account.
Our winner for dating pool size — hands down — is Positive Singles. It’s an extensive and popular site, so it’s hard to beat its member size, including over 2 million active profiles and 2.5 million member conversations monthly. However, we’d also like to recognize HWerks in this category. While it doesn't provide exact dating pool numbers, this site takes strides to ensure that members are serious about dating by requiring an upfront lifetime membership fee of $56 before you can even create an account. This allows for a more exclusive experience with other members dedicated to seeking love.
Winner: Meet People With Herpes (MPWH)
It’s up to you to decide how much you’d like to invest in potential romance. How much you’ll pay and how often varies from site to site. We’ve done our best to demystify this process, so you know exactly what you’re paying for and how much it costs. Some sites allow you to browse for free with limited options, while others require payment upfront. Some provide cheap trial periods so you can try out the site before committing to a subscription. Others offer a web-based application and a phone app with differing prices.
Meet People With Herpes takes the win in this category thanks to the fact that its parent company, SuccessfulMatch, also owns Positive Singles, and all of the well-designed features (including some good free ones) are available for herpes-only dating for no more than $30/month. And if you prefer the app to the browser interface, that costs no more than $15/month (though it’s important to note that these costs are mutually exclusive; a subscription to the app doesn’t unlock a browser membership and vice versa).
On the app side, these are good savings, especially compared to MPWH’s sister site’s app. The Positive Singles app costs the same as its website equivalent, so the MPWH app is something of an outlier in price. Of course, on the site side, these prices are around the middle of the pack. One month of HSV Singles, for example, is $33, and one month from Meet Positives ranges from $30-$45, depending on your subscription tier. With extended billing, those competitors get as inexpensive as $11/month, whereas the lowest monthly cost for MPWH’s site is $16.
Winner: Positive Singles
On all sites, you define your preferences and look through a list of profiles that match them. Where these sites differ is often the degree to which you can interact with other members without paying for a premium membership. Some sites only allow simple searches until you pay for a membership, while others filter searches with a free account. Most accounts require you to pay before messaging anyone, but you can return messages on Positive Singles if a premium member initiates the conversation. And there are free ways to let other members know that you’re interested, as well as badges that indicate whether the person you’re into is a premium member.
You can also use the FLAME feature for free with Positive Singles, which functions just like Tinder. You’ll swipe right or left (or click a heart or an x on the web browser interface) to indicate whether a person draws your interest based on a few images and a little bit of info. Both parties are notified when there’s a match, and if either is a premium member, they can initiate a conversation.
All of the free features on Positive Singles’ site are also available through Meet People With Herpes (they’re owned by the same company), but you stand a slightly better chance of finding a match on Positive Singles because it has more name recognition and a much larger overall user base.
Winner: HWerks
You may be focused just on dating and romance, and there’s nothing wrong with that. But, we also want to inform you about how herpes dating sites support you as a positive person. Many offer community resources, ways to connect and network, and opportunities for friendships beyond dating.
HWerks stands out in this category because, while dating is an element of the site, the overall goal of HWerks is to create a herpes-positive community. The site offers opportunities for friendship, networking, and community support through forums, secret social media groups, a newsletter, FAQs about herpes, and local, in-person support groups. Other sites on our list — like Positive Singles and Meet Positives — also offer resources, but their offerings are not quite as robust.
A herpes dating site is an online matchmaking interface in which the entire dating pool is either living with a positive herpes diagnosis or living with another STD and open to dating others with positive diagnoses. They’re essentially specialized versions of STD dating sites. Still, we’ve included the best STD dating sites in our herpes dating site guide because they can have larger dating pools and often let you filter by STD, allowing you to find other herpes-positive individuals from within that larger pool.
These websites are exclusive to people with herpes or other STDs. As a potential user, you don’t have to prove you have an infection, but if you create a profile disingenuously and are discovered, your access will be revoked. And the community is always on the lookout for bad actors, with fast, reliable ways to report suspicious profiles to site administrators.
Finding an exclusive online community of those also living with herpes can impact your dating life. We reached out to matchmaker and relationship expert Sameera Sullivan of Sameera Sullivan Matchmakers, who tells us that a herpes dating site is “a haven that provides people with STDs a chance to interact with people who are going through something similar. It is a great way to feel less isolated.”
Here are a few pros and cons of using these sites:
The main difference between herpes dating sites and general STD dating sites is STD status. All members of a herpes dating site are living with either HSV-1 or HSV-2. (Some herpes sites give the option for “unsure” if you don’t know which strain you have.)
On a general STD dating site, you may encounter members who are living with a variety of STDs in addition to herpes. The most common STD options you’ll see when setting up a profile on a general STD dating site are:
You have the option on most STD dating sites to set search preferences where you can select which STDs are acceptable in potential matches. For example, if you are HIV-positive, you may filter your searches to only see other members who are also HIV-positive.
To learn more, check out our complete guide to STD dating sites.
Even though dating sites generally offer the same features, a few things make herpes dating sites stand out from the crowd. It’s important to know how these sites compare to help you decide which one may be the best option.
The sign-up process on herpes dating sites is pretty standard. You’ll be asked to provide some basic information — age, location, gender, STD status — and set a username and password. Most sites require you to verify an email address and mobile number. Some sites require more than just basic info when you sign up to make your profile more robust. In our testing, both Positive Singles and Meet People With Herpes (MPWH) eventually asked for a copy of a government-issued ID.
These sites match you according to your dating preferences. Who do you want to be matched with? Indicate your preferred gender, age, location, STD status, and other preferences, and the site will deliver profiles that are ideal for you. Many sites also provide suggestions of profiles you might be interested in that didn’t appear in your search. The matches our testers received through Positive Singles and MPWH were consistently superior to matches from other sites.
You can customize your profile to represent you and what you want. Whatever info you enter when signing up for a dating site can always be edited later. Many sites also have additional profile sections that you can fill out with more specifics — things like lifestyle, interests, appearance, and children. You can also upload more photos for prospective matches to view. Positive Singles and MPWH have the deepest profiles, with nuanced questions to create more applicable matches and even a section to post your favorite STD-related jokes.
Looking through profiles is part of the fun. You can search based on your criteria and look at a listing of profiles you might like. But, you can also look at lists of new profiles, nearby people, suggested matches, and members who have viewed your profile. Many sites also have a “swipe left” or “swipe right” setup (similar to Tinder) to quickly indicate your interest in a stack of profiles. Of these, the FLAME feature available from Positive Singles and MPWH is the most effective.
You’ll also find supportive and welcoming communities of positive people on these sites. They offer community resources and opportunities to find friends, receive care, and get advice. Many of these sites are committed to helping herpes-positive people live fuller, healthier lives beyond dating.
Herpes dating sites take many steps to protect members’ privacy, making them safe to use. Of course, it’s important to check into the privacy policy of any dating site you choose to determine how that site specifically protects your personal information. But here are some of the privacy features you’ll see on the herpes dating sites included in our top picks:
Some sites ask or require you to upload a copy of a photo ID to verify your identity. Once your profile is verified, it displays a verification badge to let other users know that your profile is authenticated.
Most sites allow you to report any profile you think violates the site’s terms of use. If you receive any kind of harassment or another member makes you feel unsafe, you can report the profile for possible removal.
Some desktop sites include a quick exit button for discreet browsing. If you are interrupted and need to leave the site quickly to conceal your use from others, you can click the button for a fast exit.
All herpes dating sites (and all mainstream dating sites) allow you to edit your privacy settings in your profile. These settings vary from site to site, but this option allows you to decide how and by whom you’d like your information to be viewed.
The privacy policies of most sites specify whether or not they share or sell your information to third parties. Most herpes dating sites don’t, but some may use third parties for marketing, research, or payment collection purposes. It’s a good idea to educate yourself about the site you’ve chosen before creating an account.
Many herpes dating sites show up on your bank statement under a different name to preserve your privacy. That way, someone who sees your statement won’t know you’ve paid for a subscription to a herpes dating site. HWerks does a poor job concealing its name on a statement, though, so keep those documents safe if you use its services.
Best overall
Positive Singles is a well-known and thriving community of STD-positive people, many of them living with herpes. It has the largest dating pool of any STD dating site, with more than 2 million active members and over 2.5 million member conversations every month. You can browse 60,000+ success stories written by people who found love on the site. Though it doesn’t cater exclusively to the HSV community, our testing confirms that it’s likely to be your best choice.
To learn even more, read our full review of Positive Singles.
One of the best things about Positive Singles is that it offers so many resources that can help you make the most of the site and your experience as a herpes-positive person. These resources include:
As a paid member, you’ll be able to narrow your search down to cities or zip codes and use the site’s search filters to look for members with a positive herpes diagnosis. Free accounts can only filter by state and can’t search for specific STDs.
If you’d rather use the Positive Singles app instead of the website, you can download it for free. However, the app requires its own membership fees, which are identical to the fees on the Positive Singles browser interface. Paying for a membership through your desktop web browser won’t get you premium access to the app, nor will paying for premium access in the app open up premium features in the desktop browser.
Given how people are likely to want to use both an app and their computer to keep up with their dating efforts, this feels a little predatory. Ask yourself which interface you’re more comfortable with using and make sure to sign up through that.
Positive Singles is neither the most expensive nor the least expensive option among STD dating sites, but it is more expensive than many herpes-only dating sites. Here’s what it can cost to use either the app or the browser interface:
Total cost | Cost per month | Cost after a year | |
---|---|---|---|
Monthly billing | $33.99 | $33.99 | $407.88 |
Quarterly billing | $69.99 | $23.33 | $279.96 |
Biannual billing | $109.99 | $18.33 | $219.98 |
Best budget pick
All of the good things we’ve had to say about Positive Singles (and most of the less-than-good things) apply to Meet People With Herpes (MPWH). That’s because the sites are run by the same parent company (SuccessfulMatch).
There are very few meaningful differences between them, but one of those differences is the dating pool. Because MPWH is a herpes-only site, its dating pool is significantly smaller than the pool on Positive Singles. That said, with 100% of users living with a herpes diagnosis, you won’t run into a situation where you click with someone who has a different STD. This is especially true for people who want to rely on free profiles, as you can’t filter by STD on the Positive Singles site, whereas MPWH has already done the filtering for you.
One of the other noteworthy differences between MPWH and Positive Singles is the price, with the browser membership costing less per month by up to $4:
Total cost | Cost per month | Cost after a year | |
---|---|---|---|
Monthly billing | $29.99 | $29.99 | $359.88 |
Quarterly billing | $59.99 | $20.00 | $239.96 |
Biannual billing | $95.99 | $16.00 | $191.98 |
And the MPWH app membership is even less expensive:
Total cost | Cost per month | Cost after a year | |
---|---|---|---|
Monthly billing | $14.99 | $14.99 | $179.88 |
Quarterly billing | $35.99 | $12.00 | $143.96 |
Biannual billing | $54.99 | $9.17 | $109.98 |
At these rates, you stand to save up to $250 if you choose the app and select biannual billing.
Best for discreet one-on-one connection
Like Positive Singles, Meet Positives is not strictly a herpes dating site, but it does offer a few features that make it stand out as a good option for those hitting the dating scene with herpes.
The most significant upside of Meet Positives is that it offers private number calling, text messages, and video calls on your mobile phone. Using an affiliate site called Safe Connect, Meet Positives provides you with an anonymous phone number you can use to discreetly connect with other members, keeping your real contact info confidential until you feel comfortable sharing it. Unfortunately, this feature is only available with the site’s top-tier subscription.
Another draw of this site is that the standard (free) version allows you to perform a “living with” search. This means you can include which STDs you’re comfortable with partners having when searching for potential matches. This ensures that you match only with other members who are also herpes-positive. Positive Singles unlocks that capability only with a paid membership.
Free members also have more control over their exposure to the community than they’d get from competitors. You can choose who sees your photos and profile without having to pay first.
You have the option of two membership tiers that include different features and prices. With the Basic Connect plan, you can message other members, see your profile views, and perform local searches.
Total cost | Cost per month | Cost after a year | |
---|---|---|---|
Monthly billing | $29.95 | $29.95 | $359.40 |
Quarterly billing | $59.85 | $19.95 | $239.40 |
Biannual billing | $89.70 | $14.95 | $179.40 |
Annual billing | $131.40 | $10.95 | $131.40 |
The Safe Connect plan includes all of the Basic Connect features plus private video chat, call, and text.
Total cost | Cost per month | Cost after a year | |
---|---|---|---|
Monthly billing | $45.95 | $45.95 | $551.40 |
Quarterly billing | $83.85 | $27.95 | $335.40 |
Annual billing | $215.40 | $17.95 | $215.40 |
24-month billing | $65.70 | $10.95 | $131.40 |
Some features on Meet Positives are still works in progress. For example, the mobile phone app is still labeled “coming soon.” There's no listing for it in Apple’s App Store, but Google Play has it listed with over 5,000 downloads and — rather suspiciously — zero reviews. Our testers found the community forum, member gallery, polls, events, groups, gift shop, and ticketing system pages mostly blank, except for a few groups.
Best for community support
HWerks bills itself as a community of people living with herpes and HPV. Even though one facet of the site includes dating and romance, your membership with HWerks can provide much more. It offers members community support with features like chat rooms, forums, secret Facebook groups, and local support groups.
HWerks doesn’t allow you to join without paying for a membership. This helps weed out people who aren’t serious about joining the community. It offers a lifetime membership for a one-time fee of $56. Over time, this makes it a more economical choice than some, especially if you want to use the platform for casual dating and not to find a long-term relationship.
When you sign up for an account, be prepared to pay the $56 fee. After providing some personal info and creating a username and password, you’re prompted to pay up.
In testing, we were surprised by the mediocre quality of HWerks’ site design. Its landing page is well-polished, implying that you might get a superior experience to other dating sites. But the platform is middling once you’ve paid your way and the curtain is pulled aside. There’s nothing about it that’s especially well-polished, but it’s still a step above the cheap designs we’ve seen from other STD dating sites.
In addition to dating, HWerks provides many features that members use for friendship, networking, and community support.
HWerks uses PayPal and Stripe for online purchases. These are two well-known, secure companies for online transactions. Purchases show on your statement as HW Erks & Co., which feels like the bank statement equivalent of a pair of glasses and a fake mustache — no one is buying the disguise.
HSV Singles is strictly a herpes dating site, meaning that all potential partners are living with HSV-1 or HSV-2. You don’t have to worry about selecting your STD status or your STD status preference in prospective matches. While this does limit the dating pool, it also creates a smaller, more exclusive community.
Another upside of HSV Singles is that the site lets you try out a premium account for a small fee before committing to a membership. The free version has limited functionality, but you can still send a single message to connect with someone and see how the platform performs. If you upload an acceptable profile picture and fill out at least 50% of your profile, you can message one other member for free. Otherwise, you’ll have to purchase a membership to access all of the site’s features, including its instant messaging system and unlimited emails.
Membership includes:
The $5 5-day trial allows you to gain the benefits of a premium membership without having to make a long-term commitment. Of all of the dating sites in this review, HSV Singles is the only one that offers such an option. However, you can also purchase a longer subscription. Both subscription options auto-renew unless you change your subscription settings in your profile.
Total cost | Cost per month | Cost after a year | |
---|---|---|---|
Monthly billing | $32.95 | $32.95 | $395.40 |
Quarterly billing | $54.99 | $18.33 | $219.96 |
The biggest drawback of HSV Singles that we encountered in testing has to do with site design. The pages are decidedly dated, and it undermines confidence in the company’s ability to protect your information or successfully find you a match. Ultimately, the performance of the site is fine, but it's a poor interface.
For online payments, the charge on your card will appear as DATINGCUSTSERV.COM. This may reveal the fact that you’re on a dating site, but it won’t give away the nature of that site.
Herpes dating sites may not appeal to all HSV-positive people. You might decide to try out Tinder, Hinge, Bumble, or another mainstream dating site or app. If you do, disclosing your STD to any potential partners is essential. There’s a lot of advice about how to approach this, but you should do whatever feels most comfortable for you.3 Sullivan tells us that mainstream dating sites are different from STD-based dating sites “because STD dating sites provide a safe mental space” that mainstream sites don’t necessarily offer.
Here are a few tips to keep in mind:
At Innerbody Research, we thoroughly evaluate every product or service we review, including herpes dating sites. We’ve invested the time to make profiles on all of these sites, to explore the size and quality of dating pools, and to assess the performance of various site features you could only see as a member. We also sat down with a professional matchmaker and relationship expert to discuss the ins and outs of dating with an STD.
All told, our team has spent more than 200 hours researching these sites, as well as studying various aspects of herpes infection and treatment. Additionally, like all health-related content on this website, this guide is thoroughly vetted by one or more members of our Medical Review Board for accuracy.
Over the past two decades, we have helped tens of millions of readers make more informed decisions about staying healthy and living healthier lifestyles.
Sometimes, you’ll see the terms sexually transmitted disease (STD) and sexually transmitted infection (STI) used interchangeably. They don’t mean the same thing, and there is still debate about which term is more appropriate. In this guide, we use the term STD because that’s the term our reviewed sites use.
For clarification, an STI can cause an STD.8 A “disease” presents symptoms, yet some infections are asymptomatic. Many people take issue with the word “disease” — its negative connotations contribute to stigma and misunderstanding about these conditions. The desire to reduce stigma causes some to prefer “STI” over “STD.”
Sources
Innerbody uses only high-quality sources, including peer-reviewed studies, to support the facts within our articles. Read our editorial process to learn more about how we fact-check and keep our content accurate, reliable, and trustworthy.
Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. (2024). About Genital Herpes. Division of STD Prevention, National Center for HIV, Viral Hepatitis, STD, and Tuberculosis Prevention.
Suvirya, S., Shukla, M., Pathania, S., Banerjee, G., Kumar, A., & Tripathi, A. (2018). Stigma Associated with Sexually Transmitted Infections among Patients Attending Suraksha Clinic at a Tertiary Care Hospital in Northern India. Indian Journal of Dermatology, 63(6), 469-474.
Ferreira, A., Young, T., Mathews, C., Zunza, M., & Low, N. (2013). Strategies for partner notification for sexually transmitted infections, including HIV. The Cochrane Database of Systematic Reviews, 2013(10).
MedlinePlus. (2022). Genital herpes - self-care. National Library of Medicine
Planned Parenthood. (2011). I was just diagnosed with herpes? How can I have sex and not spread it? Planned Parenthood.
NIH News in Health. (2010). Herpes in Hiding - Genital Herpes Often Unrecognized. National Institutes of Health.
Cuddy, S. R., Schinlever, A. R., Dochnal, S., Seegren, P. V., Suzich, J., Kundu, P., Downs, T. K., Farah, M., Desai, B. N., Boutell, C., & Cliffe, A. R. (2020). Neuronal hyperexcitability is a DLK-dependent trigger of herpes simplex virus reactivation that can be induced by IL-1. ELife, 9.
Planned Parenthood. (2022). STI vs STD — What’s the Difference? Planned Parenthood.