Teen Dating Violence

As teens begin to navigate the world of romantic relationships, they can sometimes find themselves in abusive situations without realizing that their partner's behavior is unhealthy. The CDC’s 2019 Youth Risk Behavior Survey found that one in every eight U.S. high school students has experienced dating violence.1 The violence itself may come in many forms, from bullying on social media to physical harm. What’s more, teens who experience abuse, whether as the victim or perpetrator, are more likely to experience it again as adults. Stopping the cycle requires recognition of the problem and active solutions. To that end, read on to learn more about the types of teen dating abuse, who it affects most, and where to find help.

Teen dating violence refers to any type of physical, psychological, or sexual abuse within a current or past intimate relationship between teenagers. It’s a common problem, too, with 8.2% of students reporting physical dating violence and another 8.2% having experienced sexual dating violence.1 Such abuse isn’t limited to face-to-face or physical situations, either; it can also be psychological and take place through phone calls, text messages, and the internet. The idea is to exercise power and control over another person.

We should keep in mind that dating violence is a complex issue, one that may challenge our notions of both abusers and the abused. For example, women are more often victimized as a population, but men who report being victims of dating violence contend with a higher number of repeated occurrences.1 Also, physical dating violence is often bidirectional, or mutually performed by both parties in the relationship. A recent publication by the National Institute of Justice revealed that 84% of victims in teen dating relationships are also the perpetrators of abuse, implying that abusive dating experiences inform how people learn to deal with conflict and may initiate a cycle that negatively impacts present and future dating partners.2 Such considerations illustrate the importance of acknowledging context when proposing interventions for an abusive relationship.

Types of abuse

It’s important to understand that, despite many misconceptions, dating violence isn’t always physical. For example, with the prevalence of social media and other digital spaces in our culture, teens find themselves increasingly vulnerable to bullying and psychological abuse online. By learning about the different types of abuse, you can better identify abusive behaviors in your own life or the life of someone you care about.

Warning signs of abuse

Certain dating behaviors perceived as "normal" may instead be warning signs of future dating abuse, and the behaviors may intensify over the course of a relationship. If you or someone you know is in a dating relationship, be wary of the following red flags:

• Any form of physical harm
• Extreme jealousy
• Controlling behaviors
• Isolating a partner from friends or family
• Insulting or shaming a partner in front of others
• Checking a partner’s phone or social media without permission
• Pressuring a partner to have sex or use alcohol or drugs

Teens experiencing dating violence should consider documenting abusive episodes — not only what happened but when it happened, along with photos or screenshots of visible injuries or abusive behaviors, if possible.

Victims of physical dating violence should seek medical care after their abuse, as well, even if their injuries aren’t visible. At the bottom of this page, we’ve listed some of the many available resources that can offer immediate support to those in abusive relationships.

As teens grow and develop, they're constantly taking in messages from their family, peers, environment, and the media about what's "normal" in a dating relationship. Sadly, teen violence is heavily linked to mistreatment as a child, including physical abuse from a caregiver or sexual abuse.

Who is most affected by dating violence?

Research has shown that the risk of involvement in dating violence (whether as the victim or the perpetrator) increases for teens who:

• Experience or witness violence at home
• Think dating violence is acceptable
• Have friends or peers in violent relationships
• Have experienced harsh parenting
• Lack supervision
• Have multiple sexual partners
• Use illegal drugs
• Are aggressive toward their peers
• Have experienced trauma
• Suffer from low self-esteem, depression, or anxiety

In addition to these risk factors, studies have shown that certain populations of teens are more commonly victimized than others. The 2019 CDC study found that a teen’s sex and sexual identity had a greater influence on their risk of victimization than their race or ethnicity, with the greatest risk experienced by women (especially at ages 18-24) and LGBT students.1 The CDC’s findings correspond with 2018 research that found lesbian, gay, bisexual, questioning, and transgender teens to be at an elevated risk for partner violence.3

The consequences of being in a violent dating relationship are both short- and long-term.4 Below are some of the ways that dating violence can impact the victim:2

• Mental health: Victims of dating violence are at higher risk for depression, anxiety, PTSD, antisocial behavior, and suicidal ideation.
• Physical health: Teen dating violence victims are more susceptible to physical health problems stemming from risky sexual behaviors and unhealthy BMI. They may also experience symptoms such as headaches and gastrointestinal distress.
• Substance abuse: Experiencing teen dating violence may increase one’s likelihood of using and abusing drugs, alcohol, or tobacco.
• Victimization: Those abused in high school are more likely to be victims again later in life.

Teens and young adults, who experience more dating violence than any other age group, can take proactive steps toward preventing dating violence. Establishing boundaries and good communication is an essential starting point for giving shape to acceptable and unacceptable behaviors.

Those who exhibit abusive behaviors should seek professional support for managing their emotions and treating others with respect. Therapy and anger management can help you identify the roots of your abusive tendencies, take accountability for your behavior, and promote positive relationship dynamics. Abusive behavior often intensifies with time, so early intervention is key.

It’s also up to families, schools, and communities to help guide younger generations into healthy relationships. This can be done by:5

• Creating safe environments (i.e., social environments at school and in neighborhoods)
• Supporting survivors through programs
• Breaking the cycle through parenting programs and treatment for at-risk kids
• Teaching healthy relationship skills through social-emotional learning
• Incorporating positive influences and allies through family programs

Additionally, research has shown that intentional programs can be effective in preventing teen dating violence. Some of the well-studied programs that have been integrated into school curricula or community outreach programs include Safe Dates, the Youth Relationships Project, and Shifting Boundaries. The CDC has a program, too, called Dating Matters, which uses multiple strategies to teach young people aged 11-14 about healthy relationship skills before they begin dating.

Hotlines

• Love Is Respect
• National Domestic Violence Hotline
• Rape, Abuse, and Incest National Network (RAINN) National Sexual Assault Hotline

Suicide prevention

• 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline
• 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline Chat and Text
• Crisis Text Line
• The Trevor Project

Resource centers

• Safe Place
• National Resource Center on Domestic Violence
• National Sexual Violence Resource Center
• National Online Resource Center on Violence Against Women

Government resources

• Office on Violence Against Women
• Office on Women’s Health, Relationships, and Safety
• CDC Violence Prevention
• CDC Dating Matters
• CDC Adolescent and School Health
• CDC Intimate Partner Violence Resources